V. 17 And to Adam, he said, “Because you have listened to the voice of your wife and have eaten of the tree of which I commanded you, ‘You shall not eat of it,’ cursed is the ground because of you; in pain you shall eat of it all the days of your life; thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you; and you shall eat the plants of the field. By the sweat of your face you shall eat bread, till you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken; for you are dust, and to dust you shall return.”
I had this thought, “Are the things we speak to our partner making their life more difficult? Are the requests, expectations, and comments improving the peace and rest? Or are we a ‘curse to their ground’, someone who makes their life more difficult, more painful, more thorny, and more tiring? What do I bring with me?”
While this verse is talking about Eve’s effect on Adam, the verse is clear that God put the responsibility and the consequence on Adam. I also think it’s very possible (and is not uncommon) for a husband to make life difficult for his wife.
As early as Genesis 3, the Bible was already revealing one major way we kill relationships: by making their life difficult by the things we ask them to do, particularly, asking people to sin. And what is sin? Is it simply asking someone to do something society agrees is bad? The Bible takes it further. Sin includes anything that gets in the way of us and God. Eve asked Adam to partake of something she thought was pleasing and beneficial. Are we asking our partners to partake in things that are seemingly pleasing and beneficial but actually lead to them having a more difficult, painful, thorny, and more tiring life?
As I was typing my thoughts on this verse, I remembered another verse I never thoughts was related:
“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”
- Matthew 11:28
This is followed by what seems like an oxymoron of a yoke and burden combined with rest:
“Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”
- Matthew 11:29-30
There is a similarity that they’re both invitations to attractive things, but one ended in pain and weariness, the other leads to rest. Which invitation am I taking? Which invitation am I offering?
Jesus never removed responsibility and burdens to achieve rest (which is what our leisurely culture likes to do) nor did he glorify the lack of rest as a sign of responsibility (which workaholics like to do). In fact, who was He inviting? Those on vacation? Those with no issues? Those with no concerns? No. He was inviting those who are working, who are carrying large responsibilities. You don’t invite someone you don’t want to welcome. He wants to welcome us to His rest.
As a worker, and as a person with growing responsibilities, I find it helpful to listen to God’s voice, to look for what He’s saying through circumstances, through others (such as my wife), and through His word, which is why I make time to do my morning devotions. Everything else can wait.
As a leader, as a husband, as a father, as a friend, I am convicted and led to repent. Am I gentle and lowly in heart? Do I lead in such a way that our goals and achievements are not causing others to be further away from God and further away from His rest? What do I bring with me? I can see many areas I can improve. I am grateful that I have Jesus to look up to.
Let it never be said by God to anyone, “Because you listened to the voice of David… …you are cursed.” What a chilling thought. #DB